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Sunday, September 24, 2006 |
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now playing| rooftops and invitations
artist| dashboard confessional
mood| longs well
"& underneath where the welcome touch of skin and skin will meet"
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tell me i'm wrong to say;
i can't expect you to spend forever with me
i live for that single moment!
so take take, everything, leave me scrambling
reaching for something
that wasn't there in the first place
my sudden urge for August In Bethany has come and not gone. every single time i hear it, i break into a trance and remain there for an approximate 92103821129381minutes. everytime. it's not so much of the music, it's not so much of the tune, or even the lyrics, it's the voice. trust me, close your eyes and imagine the guy singing it to you, you'd weep like a fucking baby if you were in a situation that has any of, even the slightest, resemblance to what he's singing about. his desperation comes off so real, so tangible, so close, so much so that the words literally brushes through my face.
"DON'T GO, YOUR EYES IT SEES THROUGH MY SOUL"
sure it might not mean anything when you read it, but how many of your soulmates actually does sees through you soul? it's something we don't question ourselves everyday. "i love you" really has been over-used, over-rated, & rendered meaningless after awhile.
i don't know how a successful, perfect, & fully functional & operational relationship should work, or how i should go about doing it. it's not supposed to be this hard, this early. sometimes your words penetrates so hard that i bleed. I'M NOT EMO, i'm just trying to let go.
& sometimes all i wanna do is to dig myself a little hole, inside your precious heart, watch the world go by with you by my side all the time. but as tempting as that sounds, i'm not peterpan and you are not tinkerbell - welcome to the real world.
i'm sorry for making mistakes, but please try to understand how i feel, and sometimes all i need is a little pampering. is that really so hard? why can't i feel the least bit sad, you have to at least allow me to allow myself sometime to let everything sink in and settle, i can't just up and go, it's not me. i don't hide, but if i'm forced to, it's a fight or flight thing. i'm so sorry. i don't know if i can make it, & i don't know if i'm that strong.
& what about our plans for forever? can we not put it on haitus, because i'd give the world to continue our story, until the day my body meets dusts.
i'll be alright when my hands get warm.
6:58 PM
